Bedwetting 101: What you need to know
We love our children more than life itself and Double Stuff Oreos, but dealing with their bodily functions can be mentally draining. Or, in this case, bodily dis-functions when an older child (age five and up) has a problem with bedwetting. Joanne Kimes, author of “Potty Training Sucks: What to do When Diapers Make you Miserable,” explains why your child is wetting the bed and what can be done about it.
By Joanne Kimes
As frustrating as it can be to deal with waking up to a full load of laundry each morning, bedwetting is no picnic for your child either who has to deal with the embarrassment and humiliation. So let’s see what we can do about this situation because, if you’re dealing with bedwetting after potty training, “urine” need of some education.
Primary Bedwetting
To begin with, there are two types of bedwetting in older children. The primary being when your child has never been dry at night for longer than a six-month period. This type occurs more often in males, and will decline with age. The causes are varied but not one of them has to do with the child’s laziness or any improper parenting skills, despite your feelings to the contrary. No amount of scolding, pleading, or candy-coated bribes will make the situation go away.
The most common reasons for primary bedwetting are that the child’s bladder is small, the muscles that control the bladder aren’t working together correctly, or too much urine is produced either due to late night drinking or a hormonal issue that prevents their body from producing less urine at night like it should be. There can also be a problem with the signal from the bladder to their brain that’s supposed to alert Junior that it’s time to make a pilgrimage to the potty. Studies also suggest that children who wet their beds are deeper sleepers than those who don’t.
Secondary Bedwetting
The secondary type of bedwetting is when a child has been dry for at least a six-month period and then starts wetting their bed. In this case, the cause may be due to severe stress such as a death in the family, a divorce, a bullying peer, or even sexual abuse. It could also be due to a new medical condition such as diabetes or even a seizure disorder.
So, what’s the solution? First, no matter the type, make an appointment with your child’s pediatrician to find out if the reason is physical. If it is, there are medications to take and minor surgeries to correct any abnormalities. If your child is going through a stressful period, have your pediatrician suggest a child psychologist.
If your child is given a clean bill of health both mentally and physically here are some other ideas:
1. Restrict liquids two hours before bedtime and do away with diuretics like caffeinated colas.
2. Wake your child before you go to bed at night and have him use the bathroom to reduce the amount of urine he’ll have to hold during the night.
3. Buy an alarm that is snapped into your child’s pajamas and goes off whenever liquid is detected (there are several brands, all of which are available on-line).
4. Get a waterproof mattress pad!
5. For sleepovers without shame, buy specially made diapers for older children that go virtually undetected under pajamas.
Most importantly, don’t yell at your child. In fact, if you or your spouse was a bedwetter as a child (which is more than likely since the condition tends to be a genetic) tell your child stories. Kids can’t get enough of embarrassing mom and dad tales like “when I was young I farted during an oral report”. And, as hard as it may be to do, relax and know that (unless the cause is psychological or due to a physical abnormality), over time your child’s internal plumbing will mature, and the accidents will decrease along with the size of your pile of laundry!
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