Michele Thompson, MS

You have heard of No Child Left Behind, an important initiative in promoting the education of your children. But did you know that the No Child Left Inside movement is just as essential in the health and success of your child? The incidence of childhood obesity, depression, ADHD and other behavioral and learning disorders has increased with the number of hours children spend plugged in to the TV, video games and the computer. Richard Louv, author of Last Child in the Woods, has termed this problem “Nature Deficit Disorder.” Bridging the gap between your child and nature can help protect them from both physical and mental disease.

What is Nature Deficit Disorder?

Nature Deficit Disorder is not a medically diagnosed disease – not yet – but is a term that describes the waning connection to – and ebbing appreciation of – nature and the health benefits of making nature a part of your and your family’s lives. Research indicates that 80 percent of the average American child’s playtime is spent “plugged in.” No surprise that studies also report at least 20 percent of American children are clinically obese – this does not take into account the percentage of children that are “just a little pudgy.”

Don’t keep nature from your kids!

Even though the great majority of Americans live in urban areas, there is no reason that today’s youth should be relegated – or allowed – to spend the majority of their day indoors tethered to some form of technology.

Reflect back on your own childhood and recall what your afternoons and weekends were like. “Growing up in a small town, we were allowed to go off and play as long as we were home before dark, says Melanie L, mother of two. “So we’d go in the woods behind our house and catch frogs in the pond, build forts and played anything we could think of – always outside – even when it was snowy and cold. It was practically a punishment to stay inside and play,” she adds.

You may not live in a small town or feel safe letting your kids venture out by themselves, but you can keep them involved in healthy outdoor activity. Tammy G., proud mother of an active 5-year old, takes every opportunity to make nature a part of her and her family’s lifestyle. She feels that there is no reason to keep kids from connecting to the great outdoors.

She says, “[There are] no barriers – we jumped out of the car on the way into school just this morning and [my son] challenged me to find a snail, saying ‘Whoever finds the first snail wins!’” Nature is all around, even in the most urban of areas. Tammy adds, “We spend a lot of time at the park. We put down a blanket and [my son] runs around in the grass or chases bugs.”

The health of the environment is also at stake

Thomas Baumeister, education bureau chief of Fish, Wildlife, and Parks in Helena, Montana, says that the obvious health problems that come with living an indoor, sedentary life are not the only issues at hand.

According to Baumeister, the health of the environment is also at stake. “A big concern with today’s children living “plugged in” to technology and not connected to nature, is that they will not grow up with the appreciation of nature – our Earth – which means they will not have the same passion of previous generations to preserve natural habitats, recreation areas or other open spaces.”

Fostering an appreciation of nature in your children is an easy feat. Jean G., mother of four and grandmother of one, knows the outdoor time her kids spent in their youth is beneficial. She says, “For vacations we always did ‘outdoorsy’ things, like camping and skiing. This really helped to instill an appreciation for nature that is with them to this day. They are all grown now, but still like going camping, hiking and skiing.”

There are far-reaching benefits of nature

Being outside is good for children. In addition to staying physically active, children can develop a great sense of self-confidence because exploring nature is self-directed. Free, unstructured play enhances creativity and decision-making skills. Children learn about themselves and they learn about the natural world.

Simply being outdoors with green plants, fresh air and the sounds of nature – whether you are a kid or an adult – is a proven stress buster. In addition, keeping your kids actively engaged in play or physical activity can help improve their ability to be deep thinkers, concentrate and do better at school.

Read more:

• 10 ways to bridge your child and nature

Michele Thompson, MS

In his book Last Child in the Woods, Richard Louv lists 100 actions that you can incorporate into your life to help bridge your children (and self) to nature, to transform communities to be more nature-centric, ways professionals and educators can promote nature in their work, goals for government support, and steps to build local and global movements connecting children to nature. You can start today. Here are 10 ways to become involved in putting a stop to nature deficit disorder.

1. Invite native flora and fauna into your life. Christiana B., mother of three, says, “Our family as a whole has a great appreciation for nature. Just today [my middle child] was helping his daddy fix the sprinklers in the backyard so that he and I could plant seeds to watch flowers grow. He loves to water flowers and talk about his surroundings and we encourage it by allowing him to get dirty and play in leaves and dirt.” She adds, “The joy of watching my son get excited about planting seeds and watching flowers grow reminds you of the simple things that are so important!” In addition to planting a garden, you can also maintain a birdbath or birdhouse or even an insect board (drop a piece of wood on a wet patch of grass and leave it for a couple of days – insects will collect underneath). For more ideas, visit the National Audubon Society’s Invitation to a Healthy Yard or the National Wildlife Federation’s tips to make your yard a Certified Wildlife Habitat.

2. Encourage your kids to camp out in the backyard. Pitch tents and leave it up all summer. Give them journals or recorders and tell them to keep track of the nighttime sounds, the changes in the sky and the drop in temperature. Share with them your experiences camping when you were young (and if you didn’t have a chance to camp in your youth, join your kids in the tent and experience it with them). For more adventures in nature or if you don’t have a backyard, visit www.recreation.gov to find campgrounds in your locale.

3. Create a daily green hour. Allow your children to spend an hour of unstructured play and interaction in nature. Sarah C., mother of two, says, “We turn off the television and my son and I chase each other, dance around, or when its warm enough, we go for walks.” Kids don’t need constant structured play. Encourage independent exploration to help your children develop new skills and self-confidence.

4. Go for a family walk when the moon is full. Take along a flashlight and a map of the constellations. Point out the astral wonders and teach your kids the names of the various constellations. Go for a walk again the next full moon and see how many they remember. You can also star and moon gaze from the comforts of your backyard or patio.

5. Invent a nature game. Go for a hike or visit a nearby park or lake and play the “name game.” Ask your children to tell you the names of various flora and fauna. You can also play the “find game.” Have your children find 10 mammals or 10 fish or 10 insects. Point out animal tracks, nests or other indications of wildlife and ask them to tell you the animals associated with them.

6. Go digital with nature photography. Digital or even disposable cameras are invaluable tools to learn about nature – and they are fun for all ages. Chris T., father of two, regularly hands a disposable camera to his oldest son and tells him to go outside and take pictures. He says, “When my son comes home from taking photos, we download them and talk about the trees, grass, animals or other outdoor things he’s photographed.” Take it a step further and make a nature scrapbook, letting your children include stories about their pictures. Allow your children to explore and experiment with their photography. Resist telling them how to aim and shoot. Let them do their own thing.

7. Teach your children to hone their senses. Explain to your children they have five senses – hearing, sight, smell, touch and taste – and to use their senses to learn about their natural environment. Have them sit outside – in your backyard or some other outdoor location in nature – and use all of their senses to describe their experience. Have them tell you what they heard, saw, smelled, felt and tasted (obviously, taste is subject to safety).

8. Embrace the winter. Connecting to nature is not exclusive to summer or perfect weather. Bundle up and go romp in the snow. Have your kids build snow sculptures or go snowshoeing. When it rains, put on the slickers, grab the umbrella and let your kids observe the effects rain has on the earth and animals as well as the many sounds it makes as it pitter patters on the rooftops, ground, grass or through the trees.

9. Visit farmer’s markets or farm stands. If you can’t grow a garden at home, help your kids learn about and appreciate where their food comes from. Give them a list of different fruits and vegetables and make a scavenger hunt out of your visit.

10. Get involved with scouting or programs like Camp Fire USA or 4-H. Check with your local listings for youth naturalist programs or other outdoor activities organized by local recreation and park organizations.

Read more:

• No child left behind: Putting an end to Nature Deficit Disorder

Tracy B. McGinnis

1. Prepare yourself and avoid the “booby traps.”
Experts agree that asking questions, gathering information and finding a lactation consultant prior to breastfeeding are key in making the transition a smooth one. Dr. Pamela Berens, M.D., Associate Professor Department of Obstetrics, Gynecology, Reproductive Sciences at the University of Texas Medical School at Houston and certified lactation consultant, says often women don’t have a mother, close friend or family member from whom they can get enough information about nursing, and doctors aren’t always in the know, either. “Many health care professionals aren’t taught about breastfeeding and may not have adequate information to answer your questions, but many hospitals have a lactation consultant on staff.”

If your hospital doesn’t have one on staff, ask your doctor for a referral or seek out experts from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) or the Academy of Breastfeeding Medicine (ABM).

Andi Silverman, author of “Mama Knows Breast: A Beginner’s Guide to Breastfeeding” suggests programming your lactation consultant into your cell phone. “If you need help, you’ll know where to find it.” Silverman adds to get help as soon as possible. “The longer you wait, the worse the problem will get.”

In addition to seeking out a lactation consultant, Silverman suggests reading a breastfeeding book, watching another mom breastfeed or taking a breastfeeding class. “Those little babes come out hard-wired, knowing instinctively how to eat. We, unfortunately, need to learn how to feed them.”

Danielle Rigg, co-founder/CEO of the non-profit BestForBabes.com, says to treat preparing for breastfeeding like working out, planning a wedding or interviewing for a job. “The worst time to learn about breastfeeding is after the baby is born when you’re exhausted, vulnerable and your self-confidence is low.”

Rigg says women need to educate themselves about what she calls “booby traps” associated with breastfeeding, referring to the myths, misinformation and other pitfalls. “Turn down and toss out the formula freebies: It’s like having a box of donuts in your house when you go on a diet!”

2. Feed baby soon after delivery
“Feed the baby as soon as possible after the delivery,” says Silverman. “Also, keep her in your recovery room, rather than the nursery, so that you’ll be able to feed her as soon as she starts crying. Put a note on the bassinet telling the nurses that you are breastfeeding, and you don’t want your baby to have a bottle or pacifier.”

Stacey H. Rubin, M.N., APRN, IBCLC, and author of The ABCs of Breastfeeding: Everything a Mom Needs to Know for a Happy Nursing Experience, agrees with Silverman and says avoiding separation after birth is important is establishing the breastfeeding relationship and bonding. “Hold the baby immediately after birth and establish what is comfortable for both you and your child.”

Berens adds, “The baby is usually in a more alert state at this time than he or she may be in the next 24 hours. A newborn may take 10 to 15 minutes each breast at each feeding, so she will be spending a lot of time early on breastfeeding. When the baby is more experienced and her milk supply is established, the baby will nurse more quickly and less often.”

3. “Early and often”
Dr. Berens says many women are surprised at how often they need to nurse, especially early on when babies are learning and moms are establishing their milk supply.

“I see many new mothers who have a ‘perceived’ insufficient supply of milk. Many of these mothers really do have enough milk, but some don’t make enough milk. For those who don’t make enough milk, many times it is because the mother didn’t feed the baby frequently enough and therefore her body didn’t get enough demand to make more milk. This is really a situation where adequate supply typically results from adequate demand.”

Berens suggests starting off with frequent nursing (10-12 times a day on each breast) and decrease frequency as the baby gets more efficient and confident.

4. Wait for bottles and pacifiers
Silverman says that waiting until your baby is three to four weeks old before trying to give her a bottle will give your milk supply time to establish. Berens agrees and says using formula instead of breastfeeding will result in less demand on your body to make milk.

“The baby has to learn how to get the milk from your breast and the way the baby feeds from a bottle requires different mechanics for the baby’s mouth. It can make it more difficult for the baby to learn to breastfeed if you use a bottle early.”

One reason new moms may be temped to use a bottle is a fear that their baby is not getting enough food or gaining weight. Berens says, “Don’t give the baby a bottle ‘just in case’ unless there is a real medical reason (like your baby has lost too much weight since birth). Many women give the baby formula because they don’t trust that their baby is getting enough food.”

5. Have a positive mindset
First-time moms can have anxiety when approaching breastfeeding, and although normal, experts suggest finding ways to work through you fears early on. “Develop a positive mindset and know how to handle your problems as they arise,” suggests Rubin. “If you have a negative view from the onset, your guaranteed problems and likely to give up at the first sign of trouble.”

Rigg’s tip – get inspired! “One of the most important things you can do it watch another mother breastfeed and find out what motivates you.”

6. Learn to recognize hunger signals
It may be difficult to understand your little one at first, but recognizing your baby’s hunger signals is another way to improve your chances for successful breastfeeding. “Your baby is unique and will give off unique signals to tell you that he/she is ready for feeding. Trust yourself; you know more about your child than you think,” says Rubin.

7. Don’t be shy about breastfeeding
“Unless you plan on spending months on end tethered to your couch, you will be taking that baby out with you,” says Silverman. “She’ll need to eat, and soon enough you’ll get used to feeding her anywhere and everywhere so don’t be shy about breastfeeding outside your home.” Silverman also suggests learning how to use a breast pump so that you can leave a bottle for someone to give the baby, which will allow you to get out of the house.

8. Ask for help
Lactation consultant Irene Zoppi suggests surrounding yourself with people you can offer you encouragement. “Support organizations such as La Leche League International (LLL) and the Nursing Mothers’ Council offer breastfeeding support to women in local communities. By attending League meetings you’ll have the opportunity to meet and compare notes with other breastfeeding mothers.”

Silverman adds, “Enlist your family, friends and spouse to help you once the baby is born. Accept all offers to cook, clean and do laundry! This will allow you to concentrate on the feedings.”

9. Think ahead
The “to-do” list for a new mom is long and always growing, but thinking ahead and buying things like nursing bras before baby arrives, as well as figuring out a private place to pump when you go back to work will make your transition smoother when the time has arrived.

10. Relax and enjoy your baby
It may seem hard at first, but try not to stress out and enjoy this new bonding time you have with your baby. Berens adds, “Stress makes breastfeeding more difficult – it has to do with brain chemicals and hormones. It can make it more difficult for your milk to let down.” Berens says not to focus on just the milk, but spend time with your baby and develop a good relationship.

“Sometimes during the first few days, just lying with the baby ’skin to skin’ with the baby on your chest and warm blankets covering you both will help you to relax and possibly make the baby more ready to nurse well.”

Read more:

• Experts on breastfeeding
• The nursing explosion: New moms and breastfeeding

Jaimie Dalessio

It seems that those driver’s ed accident movies just aren’t cutting it anymore in regard to scaring new student-drivers straight. According to researchers at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP), taking stricter action is what’s necessary in order to prevent the No. 1 killer of teens: Motor vehicle crash injury.

Recommendations from the New Jersey Commission include more than just buckling up. Says Flaura Winston, M.D., Ph.D., the co-scientific director of CHOP’s Center for Injury Research and Prevention, who also serves as the principal investigator of the hospital’s Young Driver Research Initiative, “The commission’s recommendations are right in line with the most current research in the field of teen driving,” she said. That means, lots more mom and dad driving time, no nighttime trips, no cars full of friends, and – this is the one that teens actually like – later school start times.

Winston and her colleagues recommend that Pennsylvania and other states tailor driving laws to New Jersey Commission’s recommendations, though no state has adopted all of them. Below is the list, obtained from their press statement:

Nighttime no-no’s: Placing a limit on unsupervised driving at night will remove teen drivers from proven dangerous situations. More than half of all fatal nighttime crashes involving teens occur from 9 p.m. to midnight.

There’s such a thing as too many friends: Limiting the number of passengers under age 18 will remove teen drivers from proven dangerous situations. Fatal crash risk increases exponentially with each additional teen passenger.

Buckle up, no questions asked: Closing loopholes in restraint laws to require seat belt use in every seating position will save lives. Of all age groups, teen drivers are the least likely to use seat belts. In 2005, two-thirds of teen drivers and passengers killed in crashes were not wearing seat belts.

50 hours of fun: The Commission’s recommendations to extend the length of the permit phase and establish a framework for sufficient behind-the-wheel training are well founded. Research demonstrates that lots of practice under varied conditions is protective for novice drivers. 50 hours of supervised driving is considered a minimum by experts.

Driving Ms. Mom: Parents need to understand their role through the driver training phase, all the way through their teens’ first years of independent driving. They need the right tools to keep their teens safe.

Dollars for driver’s ed: The Commission should be commended for recognizing that funding and access to driver education and training must be preserved. Work should be done to determine effective best practices for teaching new drivers and how to best incorporate them into training programs.

Hold those school bells: By recommending that schools implement later start times, the commission also addresses the commonly overlooked problem of drowsy driving among teens, a major cause of crashes.

Through a groundbreaking teen driving research partnership, CHOP and State Farm Insurance Companies are working to develop effective interventions to dramatically reduce teen crashes nationally.

Read more:

• Top 10 distractions of teen drivers
• Parenting teens

by Joanne Kimes

Some parents have it lucky. They give birth to miraculous kids that sleep through the night, don’t have tantrums and eat anything you put in front of them. And then there’s my kid.

A child that’s so exhausting to deal with, the closest thing she’ll ever have to a sibling is her pet goldfish. When it comes to her finicky eating habits, it’s a wonder she gets enough nutrients in her to survive through the day.

If you have a picky eater too, you know firsthand how frustrating it is to get them to eat a variety of foods instead of just a steady diet of mac n’ cheese and some kind of nugget. But there is hope. With a few kitchen gadgets, and a few deceptive tactics far greater than any used in the military, your kid will be chowing down on something that may actually be good for him (although you don’t need to tell him that!).

• Hide the good stuff. Long before there were cookbooks (and later lawsuits) by women such as Jerry Seinfeld’s wife, moms were hiding healthy foods in vessels like sauces, baked goods, and casseroles. My personal favorite hiding place: pancake batter. If lack of protein is your issue, use two egg whites to replace one whole egg and substitute half soy milk for cow’s milk. If lack of fiber is the problem, use less flour (or pancake mix) and add flax seed meal, a great source of fiber and omega-3. No matter what you’re hiding, add a splash of vanilla extract to the batter to pump up the flavor so it’s less noticeable.

• Make food fun. You think kids would eat celery with peanut butter and raisons if it weren’t called “Ants On A Log”? Give food a silly name or make it more kid friendly, and your child will be gobbling it up faster than sand at the playground! Add a few drops of food color to turn a boring breakfast into “green eggs and ham.” If your child doesn’t like milk, add a few drops of blue to create “Blue’s Clues Milk.” A once-forbidden slice of whole wheat bread will quickly become a favorite if you toast it, cut it into a circle with a large biscuit cutter, scrape off eyes and a smile and present it as “Tubbie Toast”!

• Make food plain. Finicky kids like things simple and texture free. Strain pulp from orange juice, put canned sauce in a blender to get rid of all those yucky chunks and don’t even think about adding “grass” (finicky-eater kid lingo for any kind of herb).

• Have your kids help out in the kitchen. If you can get your child to help make their meals, you’ll stand a much better chance of getting them to eat it.

• Use chicken stock as a secret weapon. Any food will have a lot more flavor if it’s cooked in stock instead of water. Use it to steam veggies (especially broccoli) and add some to pasta water (they’ll even eat whole wheat pasta!).

• Use peer pressure. This same influence that may one day lead to smoking and wearing those low-ride jeans where their underwear hangs out, can actually work in your favor now. If your child sees his friend eating something healthy, there’s a greater chance your kid will eat it too.

Although your child will probably never outgrow his fondness for all things pizza and ice cream (I never did), hopefully you can use these tips to get some healthy food in him so you won’t worry so much about the other junk he’s putting in his mouth. Except for that playground sand because that’s just gross.

Read more:

• Fixing a finicky eater
• Meal planning ideas from Chef Mom
• Planning a family-friendly dinner

• he is five or more years younger than you are.
• he is five or more years younger than your oldest child.
• he makes you feel 10 years younger.
• you make him feel 10 years younger.
• he lets you make most of the financial decisions…
• most of the finances are yours.
• he makes you laugh.
• you make him laugh.
• he’s the best thing that ever happened to you.

– Celeste Gish

Read more: In praise of “trophy husbands”

Celeste Gish

The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition, defines “trophy wife” as “an attractive, young wife married to a usually older, affluent man.” Curiously, there is no entry for “trophy husband.”

In the name of equal rights I think the time has come to define, accept and embrace – so to speak – the concept. Currently, the U.S. Census reports that 12 percent of American marriages involve a husband who is two or more years younger, and 15 percent of wives out-earn their husbands by $5,000 or more. Among my own friends, a couple of long-standing love matches where the wife is the primary breadwinner and the husband is a younger hunk come to mind.

Unlike the pejorative “trophy wife” with its connotations of gold-digging Twinkies who lunch, shop and otherwise conspicuously consume, the trophy husband is a product of a generation brought up to value and respect strong women, probably starting with his mother. He has somehow evolved beyond the ancient biology that hard-wires most men to rabidly pursue the eternal 25-year-old, presumably to ensure the survival of our species. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that the human race is in very little danger of dying out these days.

Times change
Let’s review history. In the beginning, we females needed strong (cave) men who could go out and bring home the mastodon so we could stay home, keep the cave neat, procreate and nurture our young. Eons passed, and mastodons became extinct. Factories and offices were invented, and men continued to be the providers, leveraging their good names, education and earning ability into snagging the best females.

Fast-forward to the twentieth century. Women got the vote, men marched off to wars, women entered the workforce, someone invented the washing machine, and next thing you know, men were no longer in complete control. Slowly but surely, women’s roles in households and the world at large shifted. And now, with the advent of online dating and Botox, men of all ages are beginning to appreciate older women for their emotional maturity, sexual confidence and financial stability.

And it’s about time. Outmoded notions that husbands must be older and richer than their wives limit both women and men, and keep people from meeting their best match. Traditional gender roles have kept women from realizing their full potential and they’ve limited men’s lives, too.

Recently, my sister described my spouse as a trophy husband. Not that anyone would ever confuse us with Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher, but it gave me something to think about. My first thought was, you know you’re getting up there in age when a 48-year-old husband is considered a “trophy.” Then I went on to consider: he’s seven years younger than I am; he has always been attracted to “mature” women; and he is a hunk. (OK, I may be a little prejudiced.)

So what is our definition of “trophy husband”? Based on my experience, I’d say, he’s mature, whether he’s 25 or 55. He’s committed to a long-term relationship. He loves you, respects you and treats you like you’re the best thing that ever happened to him. And he’s the best thing that ever happened to you.

Read more: You may have a trophy husband if…

Celeste Gish is a freelance writer based in the Savannah area. Her work has been published in ABA Bank Marketing, Atlanta Journal & Constitution, Health Management Technology, Advance for Health Information Professionals, Realty Success and other professional journals.

Tracy B. McGinnis

Boot camp isn’t just for the military. In fact, more and more “boot camp”-inspired books, classes and fitness programs are being designed with baby-training in mind.

Baby boot camp stories of survival
When Rebecca Powell listened to the story of a young married woman in her Sunday school class about her brother’s boot camp experience, she was inspired to write a book… about babies?!

“She talked about how he was only getting around five hours of sleep each night, and he had to wolf down every meal, barely had time for everything, and had a drill sergeant that was always yelling about something,” recalls Powell. “To me, her brother’s ordeal sounded eerily like new motherhood – no time to sleep, eat someone always screaming. I knew Sondra would be facing similar circumstances in a few months.”

Powell wondered if her first days as a mom might have been smoother if she had had someone cheering her on. That afternoon, she began writing her first book, Baby Boot Camp, a collection of devotionals that encourages and supports new moms through the first six weeks of motherhood.

“I think one of the most difficult things about being a new mom is that you think you’re alone,” says Powell. “You think you’re the only mom who doesn’t have it all together, but the truth is that every new mom goes through similar feelings – no one knows what to expect.”

Powell says that motherhood puts every mom on the same page, but acknowledges that sometimes women are reluctant to admit it when things seem out of control. “It’s a great comfort to read some inspiration through those crazy first couple of months. It helps you find your balance!”

Boot camp for new dads
In 1990, a group of California dads got together to help one another learn how to be just that – dads. The organization, Boot Camp for New Dads, can now be found in over 250 neighborhoods across 39 states, as well as in the Navy, Army and Air Force.

Expectant fathers get together with new dads a few hours each week to talk about what life is like now that there is a baby at home. Their web site states that 150,000 new fathers have graduated from the program.

“Many other attempts at developing programs for new fathers have failed because their curriculum is full of preachy material everybody else wants new fathers to know or do,” explains Greg Bishop, founder of Boot Camp for New Dads.

“When we started we simply got the rookie fathers-to-be together with dads who explained what they had learned in their first several months on the job. The veterans bring their babies to provide the rookies some hands-on experience (many had never even held a baby). After the rookies watched the veterans care for their babies for 2-3 hours, they walk out thinking, “I can do that.”

Bishop says Baby Boot Camp for New Dads is a big confidence builder; he can see the difference workshops make on men, who walk out excited about being a father. “It’s your standard man-to-man approach that has worked for millenniums in hunting and gathering, sports, the military, cards and drinking games.”

The concept focuses on respect for both the “expert” dads and the father-to-be. “We build on this respect by giving them information they can trust, including alternatives, and then trust them to make the best decisions with their mates on raising their child.”

The program is also expanding nationally. The workshops, available to dads of all walks of life, recently began a program in Liverpool, England, for teen dads that Bishop says is now spreading across that country.

The organization also publishes Dads Adventure magazine and books like Crash Course for New Dads: Tools, Check Lists and Cheat Sheets. “The book covers everything we’ve learned from over 200,000 participants.

Baby boot camp fitness
Kristen Horler was having a hard time finding a challenging workout after having her first child in August 2001. An experienced fitness instructor, triathlete and personal trainer, Horler created Baby Boot Camp for new moms that allows women to get their exercise in while still spending time with their baby.

The stroller fitness classes offered by Baby Boot Camp are now available across the country and offer strength training, cardiovascular workouts, Pilates, yoga, core training and resistance training. The web site also provides a wealth of information on nutrition, fitness, wellness and women’s health.

Read more:

• New Dad resources
• Preparing for baby

by Michele Thompson, MS

When kids come into your life, the exotic or adventuresome vacations that previously thrilled you are soon replaced with kid-friendly getaways that are less than exciting for your adult tastes. Of course, the first experiences of watching your child’s glee (or horror) at the petting zoo or her uncontained excitement at a theme park is priceless, but there is still a part of you yearning for a vacation that includes some grown-up intrigue. Lucky for you, we’ve found six types of trips that are fun for the whole family.

National parks
Breathe in some fresh air and natural beauty as well as marvel at nature’s landscape and wildlife at one of the many national parks. In addition to experiencing their scenic wonders, national parks are steeped with historical significance that can be gleaned from the visitor centers as well as educational plaques located throughout each park’s expanse.

“Yellowstone National Park is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen,” says Betty Gowens, mother of two, from Fresno, California. “The close proximity of wildlife like elk and bison is exciting for kids, but also for adults, especially those coming from cities that have little exposure to animals other than house pets.” She adds, “Not only have I taken my kids to Yellowstone, I’ve also taken my parents, who are in their 80s, and plan on eventually taking my grandkids, too. There is something of interest for people of all ages.”

Find a National Park near you at the National Park Service website.

Themed festivals
Every state, if not nearly every town and city, celebrates a themed festival each year. You and your family can be transported back to the medieval days at the traveling renaissance fairs or pirate festivals. Or you can attend the epicurean festivities of the countless food-related festivals held around the country. In addition to a buffet of dishes made from the festival theme food, your family can take part in the music, dance, crafts and other area offerings.

According to Joan Steinbacher, author of Food Fest!, “these festivals have always been a means of uniting communities through celebrations of harvests and giving thanks for a plentiful growing season. They can be traced back thousands of years to celebrating the arrival of harvest time, the autumnal equinox and the honoring of earth gods.”

For many families, honoring the food gods is just fine, and opt to do so at the many food-themed festivals held each year. Think of it as a vacation of culinary satisfaction for you as an adult as well as a learning and eating experience for your kids. Some yummy picks:

• The Garlic Gilroy Festival in Gilroy, California boasts more than 36 garlic-heady foods, including garlic ice cream. It is held in July and offers arts, crafts, entertainment and a kids’ area.
• Get your fill of juicy sweet melons at the Hampton Country Watermelon Festival in South Carolina, held each June. You can enjoy the warm weather during the Family Fun Day at Lake Warren State Park or take in the pet shows, mud runs, a watermelon eating contest, watermelon judging contest, a Melon Miss pageant for all ages and the big Miss Coastal and Miss Teen Coastal Empire pageants. There is also an arts and crafts display, along with a variety of musical entertainment as well as one of the largest parades in the state.
• Just pick a food, pick a festival and then search for other family fun attractions located nearby. Be sure to book a hotel that is kid-friendly and has adult amenities like customized fitness programs.

Nature’s novelties
Imagine walking through a grove of eucalyptus trees with hundreds of brightly-colored butterflies gracefully soaring by you or hanging in dense clusters in the tree branches, their wings moving to some unheard tempo? Sounds like a fairy tale, right? However, it is a yearly phenomenon that occurs from October through February in Pismo Beach, California.

The Pismo Beach Monarch Butterfly Grove draws locals and tourists who want to witness this surreal event. The sheer number of these winged beauties will awe your children and give them something to share with their classmates and friend as well as give you and your spouse a chance to enjoy the beach for a few days.

Nature’s novelties, like the monarchs gathering, are peppered throughout the United States. From bird-watching trails with seasonal migrations to mystery spots that combine the oddity of nature and physics gone awry, there is undoubtedly a family vacation in the making. Get your kids in on the getaway planning and experience the phenomena of nature together.

Museums
Museums of all kinds are located throughout the country. Though an art museum may bore your kids to tears and a children’s museum would be less than exciting for you, multi-disciplinary and science museums can be a happy family compromise.

Shelly Borboa, a mother of two from Bozeman, Montana, takes advantage of the Museum of the Rockies (MOR) located on the Montana State University campus. “The MOR is a one-of-a-kind museum that hosts fossils and life-size replicas of dinosaurs.” She adds, “In addition to the exhibits featuring Native American and Old West culture, there is a planetarium that hosts amazing light shows and sessions educating kids and adults about the planets, stars and the night sky. My oldest son is 10 years old, my youngest is almost one and both of them enjoy the MOR attractions, as do my husband and I.”

Visit a museum that offers intrigue for people of all ages to make the most of your family outing. For a list of museums located in the United States, visit Museums in the United States virtual library.

Aquariums
If you think aquariums have little else to offer other than stare at fish behind a glass, think again. Many water-wonder meccas offer family-oriented activities, boat tours, educational exhibits and water-life entertainment. For example, The Monterey Bay Aquarium in Monterey, California is hosting a Family Day on April 27th which will include free admission for children under 12 years old, music, dance, water-life feeding programs, a craft room and prize drawings. In addition, families can discover the ocean together at the aquarium’s mainstay The Splash Zone, an interactive exhibit for adults and kids of all ages.

Amanda Rock, mother of two, from Sound Beach, New York says, “We are a big fan of aquariums – the Atlantis Marine World in Riverhead, NY is near us – because they offer a lot to keep everyone in the family occupied, from the babies who can stare at the brightly-colored fish to preschoolers and school-age kids who can run from exhibit to exhibit and do hands-on activities.” She adds, “Even tweens and teens can get in the act – it might not be ‘cool’ but chances are they really enjoy themselves and learn something in the process.”

Aquariums are not just for the young people. Rock continues, “For adults, there is a lot to learn about the local ecology of the region and different types of amphibians and reptiles as well as other animals who make their homes near water, like penguins for example.” There is also an Atlantis Explorer Tour Boat, adult programs, and your whole family can register to be a Trainer for a Day from April to September.

Find an aquarium near you and abroad at Aquariums of the World.

On-the-farm fun
Farm stands, produce barns or family-oriented agriculture centers located in the country can give you and your children the delicious pleasure of sinking your teeth into freshly picked fruits and vegetables as well as learn about how food goes from farm to table.

In addition, farm stands and local co-ops often have eco-learning centers and farm tours to give both urbanites and suburbanites a first hand look at local agriculture. With the slow food and eat local movements, you can use the experience to teach your family about eco-friendly eating and appreciating the Earth while enjoying a hayride and delectably fresh produce and made-from-the-heart baked goods and preserves.

Rock takes her family to the farm stands in Suffolk Country, NY for the “agri-tainment” as well as the fresh produce. “Farm stands are a fun place to go. They are so bright and colorful and there is always something good to eat – whether right on the spot or to bring home and use in a recipe.”

She adds, “There are often hay or horse rides, corn mazes and elaborate playgrounds. Depending upon the season, you can pick strawberries, peaches, apples, pumpkins and cut down your own Christmas Tree. Farm stands are another one of those places where everyone can get in on the act on their own level and have a good time.”

Check with your local chamber of commerce or co-op to find a farm stand, farmer’s market, produce barn or other agri-tainment near you.

Your kids won’t be kids forever so make the most of your family vacations with getaways that the whole family can enjoy. Not only will you reap the benefits of quality family time, you also instill in your kids an appreciation of travel and the many things learned on vacation.

Brie Gatchalian

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes you with a baby carriage. And what happens to s-e-x, which got you there to begin with? Well, that usually goes out the window.

For many couples, having children and changing focus can affect their sex life in a big way. More time is spent caring for and doting over baby, but what about you and your partner? You may be busy with various obligations, but neglecting sex can be treacherous. Experts agree: Don’t let starting a family affect you in the bedroom. (Yes, put it before sterilizing bottles and doing your third load of Dreft-only laundry if you have to).

“Sex is about perception,” says Debbie Mandel, author of Turn On Your Inner Light: Fitness for Body, Mind and Soul. Even simple things can keep your love life spicy, she says – committing small, considerate acts during the day, using humor and playfulness to set the mood, even scheduling sex in between feedings.

What to expect when (not) expecting sex

When it comes to fooling around, learning is fundamental. This from Mary Jo Fay, speaker, columnist, and author of Please Dear, Not Tonight: The Truth About Women and Sex, who says you and your spouse might have a thing or two to study.

Put the baby books away and “read some fun sex books together.” Just as you boned up on having a baby, you should get intimate with how to keep the sparks flying, too. “Attend a sex seminar — not because you’re dysfunctional but because you want to be stellar [in the bedroom] and you may learn something new.” Plus, it’ll be a much-needed night out; in and of itself, grown-up time is good for your libido.

Also good is honesty, along with drawing upon a few kid-friendly ideals like sharing and show-and-tell. Fay explains how important it is to stay true to your lover, opening up, “revealing a fantasy,” she says. Your husband has basically seen it all (especially after childbirth) – don’t be afraid to hold anything back now.

Get touchy feely

Just as touch is important to help your newborn bond with you, so is maintaining sexual touch with your partner. According to Jaiya, co-author of Red Hot Touch: A Head to Toe Handbook for Mind Blowing Orgasms and certified sexologist, sexological bodyworker and tantra teacher, “the biggest mistake many couples make is that they stop communicating and they stop touching.”

Doing so, however, does a body good, since it helps release a neurochemical called Oxytocin, which increases bonding and love. “Set aside a few hours of alone time – let someone take the kids for a night, light some candles and have a great meal,” she suggests, for starters. “Take some time to learn about your spouse even if you have been married for years. Ask your partner how they would like to be touched and ask them to be specific.”

Kick Dora out of your bedroom

When your bedroom inspires peace and relaxation, romance is more likely to bloom, say experts. (Tell that to a couple with Dora the Explorer DVDs in between the sheets.) If it doesn’t, then you and your lover need to draw the line and create an intimate space where personal and pleasurable moments can happen.

“Clear out clutter and remove unnecessary distractions,” says Alex Lluch, author of Simple Principles for a Happy and Healthy Marriage. “Keep items that heighten your stress levels – such as bills, work or medical items – in a separate corner of the house that you visit infrequently.” In other words, get the breast pump outta’ there!

Bottom line, says Lluch – your bedroom must be reserved for sleep and sex only! And if your budget allows it, invest in luxurious sheets and a soft comforter. Add some romance with music. “Buy a small CD player and listen to songs you both enjoy,” Lluch adds. “Candlelight and a nice fragrance will also help the mood.”

Remember, although dedicating yourself to baby is admirable and natural, so is maintaining a healthy sex life. By keeping the emotional and physical bonds that you and your partner had pre-baby strong, you’ll be setting the groundwork for a happy future filled with fun days as a family and decadent nights as a duo.